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The Road of Life
At first, I saw
God as my observer, my judge, keeping track of the things I did wrong, so as to know whether I merited heaven or hell when
I die. He was out there sort of like a president. I recognized His picture when I saw it, but I really didn't know Him. But
later on when I met Christ, it seemed as though life were rather like a bike ride, but it was a tandem bike, and I noticed
that Christ was in the back helping me pedal. I don't know just when it was that He suggested we change places, but life has
not been the same since.
When I had control, I knew the way. It was rather boring, but predictable it was the shortest
distance between two points. But when He took the lead, He knew delightful long cuts, up mountains, and through rocky places
at breakneck speeds. It was all I could do to hang on!
Even though it looked like madness, He said, "Pedal!" I worried
and was anxious and asked, "Where are you taking me?" He laughed and didn't answer, and I started to learn to trust. I forgot
my boring life and entered into the adventure, and when I'd say, "I'm scared," He'd lean back and touch my hand. I gained
love, peace, acceptance and joy; gifts to take on my journey, My Lord's and mine. And we were off again.
He said,
"Give the gifts away. They're extra baggage, too much weight." So I did, to the people we met, and I found that in giving
I received, and still our burden was light.
I did not trust Him, at first, in control of my life. I thought He'd wreck
it; but he knows bike secrets, knows how to make it bend to take sharp corners, knows how to jump to clear high rocks, knows
how to fly to shorten, scary passages. And I am learning to shut up and pedal in the strangest places, and I'm beginning to
enjoy the view and the cool breeze on my face with my delightful constant companion, Jesus Christ.
And when I'm sure
I just can't do it anymore, He just smiles and says... "Pedal."
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Subject: SMILES FROM THE BIBLE...
Q. What kind of man was Boaz before he married?
A. Ruthless.
Q. What do they call pastors in Germany?
A. German Shepherds.
Q. Who was the greatest financier in the Bible?
A. Noah. He
was floating his stock while everyone else was in liquidation.
Q. What was the greatest female financier in the Bible?
A.
Pharaoh's daughter. She went down to the bank of the
Nile and drew out a little prophet.
Q. What kind of motor
vehicles are in the Bible?
A. Jehovah drove Adam and Eve out
of the Garden in a
Fury. David's
Triumph was heard throughout the land.
Also, probably a Honda, because the apostles were all in one Accord.
Q. Who was the greatest comedian in the Bible?
A. Samson.
He brought the house down.
Q. What excuse did Adam give
to his children as to why
he no longer lived in Eden?
A. Your mother ate us out of house
and home.
Q. Which servant of God was the most flagrant
lawbreaker
in the Bible?
A. Moses. He broke all 10 commandments at once.
Q. Which
area of Palestine was especially wealthy?
A. The area around
Jordan. The banks were always
overflowing.
Q. Who is the greatest baby sitter mentioned in the
Bible?
A. David. He rocked Goliath to a very deep sleep.
Q. Which Bible character had no parents?
A. Joshua, son of
Nun.
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Application For Wisconsinship: Personal Information:
Name
___________________son
Sex: ___ Ole ___ Lena
Home Address ________________
Cabin Address ________________
Religion: _____ Lutheran ______ Catholic
Income: ____We do OK ____We're Blessed ____ None of your beeswax ____
Qualifications: (check all that apply)
___ I own a gas powered ice auger.
___ I can name a dozen celebrities who've stayed in Madison.
___ I've been trick or treating in two feet of snow.
___ My grandmother made me eat lutefisk.
___ I liked it!
___ I've been to a block party.
___ My first beer was an Old Milwaukee.
___ My snowmobile has more miles on it than my car.
___ I have a back up set of jumper cables in my trunk.
___ My second beer was an Old Milwaukee.
___ Despite what everyone else says I
DON'T HAVE AN ACCENT! (For sure, you bet I don't.) True/ False:
___ I actually listen to telemarketers.
___ "Have a Nice Day" is an ORDER!
___ TV news anchors are celebrities.
___ Part of my tongue is on a flagpole somewhere.
___ It's not a rubber binder! It's a rubber band.
___ They mistake pop for "soda" or "coke" in most other states.
___ Hot Dish is neither a beautiful woman nor an overheated
plate.
___ Paw is both a hand and the male parent. Multiple Choice:
It's time to wear a hat when:
A) The temperature
is below 10 degrees.
B) Your mother tells you to!
C) The temperature is -10 and the wind chill is in double digits.
Essay Questions:
1. What
"uff-da" means to me ____________________________________
2. What "oopsy daisy" means to me _____________________________
You know you're from Wisconsin when.....
1. Your idea of a traffic jam is 10 cars waiting to pass a tractor.
2. "Vacation" means going to
Milwaukee for the weekend.
3. You measure distance in hours.
4. You know several people who
have hit deer more than once.
5. You often switch from "heat"
to "a/c" in the same day.
6. You use a down comforter
in the summer.
7. Your grandparents drive 65
mph through 13 feet of snow during a blizzard, without flinching.
8. You see people wearing hunting clothes to social events.
9. You install security lights on your house and garage and leave both doors
unlocked.
10. You think of the major food
groups as venison, walleye and Leinenkugels.
11.
You carry jumper cables in your car and your girlfriend knows how to use them.
12. There are seven empty cars running in the parking lot at the grocery store
at any given time.
13. You design your kid's Halloween
costume to fit over a snow suit.
14. Driving is better in the
winter because the potholes are filled with snow.
15. You think sexy lingerie is tube socks and flannel pj's.
16. You know all four seasons: almost winter, winter, still winter and road
construction.
17. It takes you three hours
to go to the store for one item even when you're in a rush because you have to stop to talk to everyone in town.
18. You actually understand these jokes and forward them to
all your friends from Wisconsin.
John's Third Corner
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